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[ e u r o p e a n ] by kHo When you met them, they´d both been cordial to you. Not unfriendly, but not overly either. At first you´d thought you´d be closer to Ben than to Johnny because well… Ben just seemed more affable. It was Johnny, though, that was the first to invite you out for drinks. It was Johnny that carelessly slung an arm around your shoulder that first night in the hotel bar as he told a story about nothing that still managed to captivate your attention. It wound up being Johnny that smiled the widest and hugged you every morning when you came on set. Which is not to say that Ben wasn´t easy to talk to, or ready to laugh at anything funny. He was just more reserved than his slightly older costar. It makes sense though, because Johnny has always been more European than him. He warmed himself up to Ben almost despite himself. He´d sidle up to Ben in the mornings, maybe resting a head on his shoulders, and when Ben would flinch Johnny would just laugh and kiss him on the cheek. Ben eventually let his guard down enough to smile when he did it, but if you looked close enough you could still see the slight trepidation in his eyes. That day was a particularly bad day on set. It was one of those Murphy´s Laws catastrophe days where the director was late to set, and came with a hangover from hell on top of it. You, Johnny, and Ben were in good spirits, but nothing the three of you did seemed to satisfy the director. You began to think the day was in the tank when you and Johnny had to do a scene involving four lines ten times. Not that you minded though, because after those four lines was a kiss that was so soft and so slow that you felt like you´d melt into the floor if you weren´t already backed up into the wall. When the director finally stormed out of the room at ten till 6 that day, even going so far as to predict the ruination of the film all together, the three of you were so harried that it was all you could do to not burst out into a fit of delirious giggles. Johnny invited the both of you up for drinks and his room, and when Ben declined Johnny simply grinned at him, threw an arm around his shoulder, and forced him into the elevator beside him. He motioned for you to get in, holding the door before it could close on you, and told you to press the button for the 17th floor. Ben´s so tense you can almost feel the floor beneath you vibrate with it. You wonder why he hasn´t sprung to his feet and hightailed it out of there, but you shrug it off because you want him there. He sits with his legs drawn up, his arms encircling them, closing himself off from you on his right and Johnny on his left. His jaw is clenched, his eyes are locked on the floor, and his brain is working so fast you almost swear you can hear it. You´re torn between which one to look at. Johnny with his angelically angular face, prettier at the age of forty than any man should have the right to be. Pretty in that way that you scoff at when you see someone depicted as such in a painting. No one´s that pretty, you think to yourself. That´s an artist´s version of pretty, not reality. You´ve never met anyone as pretty as him until him, and on top of that he had that languid fluid sensuality that seemed to flow out of him like steam from a cup of hot dark coffee. Fingers that are long and thin, nimble. An artist´s fingers. Fingers that, when you let yourself think about it, make your brain shift to the lower gears and think thoughts that make you blush even though you know you´re the only one that will ever know. Or should you watch Ben. A darker beauty, one of more realistic measures. An easily dismissed handsomeness that you can´t believe you´ve never noticed before once you´ve realized it´s there. The kind of sexuality that comes from holding one´s self in, from restraint and denial. You don´t know if any of that is true, but it´s in his posture. It´s in the way he tenses when Johnny´s hand rests lightly on his shoulder, just barely tapping the fingertips on the back of his neck. You almost want him to look at you so you can see the arousal in his eyes, but you´re thankful he doesn´t because it´s a little to easy to fall into those eyes and never find your way out. You´ve already done it on several occasions before now, and none of them involved him being aroused. Johnny´s telling you of a drunken night he spent in Italy with a costar of his. He won´t mention the name of his partner, ‘to protect the fragile´ he tells you with a wink. It had started out as two American´s in a land where no one speaks English unless they want something from you, and ended up the two of them just drunk enough and laying down in a vineyard looking up at the stars. ‘It´s almost poetic, isn´t it,´ he asked, laughing as he gently ran his hand down Ben´s back. ‘Almost like I´m making that part up, to romanticize it.´ You´re sitting close enough to Ben that you can see the muscle move when his jaw clenches as Johnny´s hand moves back up to it´s position on his neck, playing lightly with the wispy hairs at the base of his neck. You look at Johnny as he´s steadily talking and wonder if he had any idea what he´s doing to Ben. You catch his eye and he glances at Ben and as his smile widens you realize he knows exactly what he´s doing to him. Before realizing this you thought things couldn´t really get much sexier than they were, and now you know how wrong you were. Johnny winks at you in a way that makes you think he´s got a few tricks up his sleeves and you feel your pulse quicken in anticipation. You can still feel Johnny´s lips on yours from before. You remember the way his tongue felt sweeping over yours, like velvet on silk. You remember the promise of what could come if things progressed, and a tingle runs through you as you allow yourself to think that if Johnny can work his magic in just the right way, you might get to experience it with Ben as well. In the middle of a sentence Johnny´s hand slowly slides up Ben´s head through his hair in a way that is very clearly more sensual than just a ruffling of the hair. His fingers clench slightly in Ben´s hair before running back down to his neck. You´re astounded at the way he is able to keep up the pretense of telling his first sexual experience with another man unfalteringly while doing this. He runs his fingers up through Ben´s hair again, this time slower, and Ben´s eyes close and he lets out a breath of air that´s accompanied by the slightest of sighs. Johnny´s hand pauses momentarily and you see his eyelids lower slightly as he bites his lip. You see the lust in his eyes and you know that any doubts you had in your head as to Johnny´s intention were unfounded. He was, quite simply, quietly seducing Ben. By the way Ben´s breathing has slowed and the fact that his eyes are still tightly shut you know he´s succeeding. You watch as Johnny continues the monologue, the only change being that his eyes are glued to Ben´s face, the hints of amusement now gone. His fingers run lightly through Ben´s short hair and you suddenly ache to be able to run your fingers through Johnny´s longer hair. You´re glued to the spot though, unable to move. The arousal you´re feeling at the rapidly unraveling situation has rendered you into a puddle of uselessness. You watch as Johnny licks his lips, leaning forward slightly on his knees. ‘You know what he said to push me over the edge though,´ he said, looking at you before continuing. Leaning forward until his lips were centimeters from Ben´s ear and pitching his voice lower than low he continued. ‘I don´t remember, I just remember the way his voice sounded.´ The moan seems to come out of nowhere, and Ben doesn´t even seem to be aware that he´s the one that made it. His breathing has quickened and you honestly don´t think his head is even in the game anymore. Johnny seizes the opportunity and lowers his mouth to Ben´s neck, his free hand splaying down the side of Ben´s face as he bites and licks Ben´s neck. Ben makes no move to stop him, his head lolling back and his mouth opening with a silent ‘oh.´ His lids are still shut but all tension that had been in his body seems to have left the second Johnny´s mouth was on his neck. In a move that is more catlike than human, Johnny has straddled Ben´s legs and is cupping Ben´s face in the gentlest of grasps as he slowly and softly kisses him. Ben´s hands wind up Johnny´s back to clasp on his shoulders, bringing him closer to him. Johnny´s decided to let Ben lead the kiss, and it´s not long before Ben´s mouth is opening for Johnny´s tongue. Their kiss deepens exponentially and soon Johnny´s breathy sighs are punctuated by Ben´s guttural ones and you realize you´ve been forgotten. You´re torn between watching the two of them and retreating to your room. Part of you is beyond turned on at the site of them, the part of you that enjoys the idea of being voyeuristic. The other part of you though, the one that has the ability to be pragmatic, tells you that what you´re seeing is a private moment that you shouldn´t be around for. You plan on returning to your room as soon as your legs regain some semblance of maneuverability, knowing that visions of the two of them would keep you company long into the night. For some reason you´d always thought that Ben would be a vocal lover, so it´s no surprise to find out that he´s a vocal kisser. Little moans, grunts of pleasure float into the room, echoed by Johnny´s breathier ones, making it impossible for you to focus on regaining the use of your legs. When Johnny´s head bends down to bite Ben´s neck and Ben lets out a long and low growl you feel yourself almost orgasm right then and there. You can see him biting his lower lip, his eyes shut and facial muscles contorted with pleasure. His hands clench Johnny´s blue shirt between his fingers, holding him as close to him as is possible. Suddenly you realize that unless you want to come right then and there, you have to leave now. You barely begin to rise when Johnny´s hand reaches blindly out and clasps heavily on your shoulder. He grabs at the collar of your shirt and pulls you forcibly forward, lifting his head from Ben´s neck just in time to kiss you slowly with an all encompassing concentration. You´re in an awkward position, your legs still half crossed as you´re on bended knee, your hands grasping Ben´s jean clad leg to hold yourself up as Johnny´s tongue winds around yours. Your last coherent thought is ‘this is so dirty´ and it is quickly wiped from your mind as you feel Ben´s hot breath wash over your neck before his mouth closes around your collarbone. You open your eyes to find Johnny´s hand on the back of Ben´s head and you realize that Johnny is the one that probably led Ben´s mouth to your neck. His teeth scrape at the hollow of the base of your neck followed by his tongue and your eyes shut. Johnny´s hand clenches into Ben´s hair and he lifts his head as he lowers his to your neck. Your eyes flutter open long enough to look into the depths of Ben´s blue eyes before his mouth is on yours. His kiss is stronger, more aggressive than Johnny´s. His hand winds into your hair, gripping it and tugging it just enough for you to feel it, bending your head back to get a better position. He sighs into your mouth, his thumb brushing over your face, whispering over your cheek as the kiss deepens. The sequence of events would never become clear to you as you looked back on it, but the feelings remained. Johnny´s hands sliding sensuously over your body as Ben´s tongue delved into your mouth. Ben´s panted breath in your ear with you in his lap, Johnny lifting the back of your shirt up, running his tongue up your spine as you let Ben have his way with you in whatever way he wanted. Johnny biting into your neck as you came, pulling you to him soon after and starting it all over again with a ‘my turn´ gleam in his eyes that you weren´t about to say no to. And afterwards, you sitting with a blanket around you, not knowing what came next. Ben leaning against the couch, the tension beginning to return to his features as he realizes what he´s done. Johnny though, sitting there Indian style in front of you, naked and smiling that lazy smile of his as he poured three glasses of rich red wine. Smacking Ben on the chest when he saw the tension in his face, forcing a glass into his hand and telling him to ‘relax for a fucking´ millisecond´ before he had his heart attack. Smiling softly at you and kissing you lightly on the mouth before settling back into the plush carpet, stretching his legs out and leaning his head back with a serene smile. You think to yourself again how European Johnny is and for some reason that makes you laugh. He looks at you as if he knows what you´re thinking and laughs with you. He starts talking about amusing anecdotes about past movies, kicking Ben with his feet until Ben starts laughing as well. A half an hour later the mood has returned to the affable every day dichotomy it was on set that day, and you let yourself relax. You know eventually you´ll part ways, and you´ll start to fret again in the darkness of your room, but one thing remains certain. No matter what moral problems you´ll have with it, no matter how wrong you know it is, this is a night that will remain in the top five best nights of your life for the next 60 years… maybe more. Fuck morality… you just had sex with Johnny fucking Depp and Ben fucking Stiller!
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